


I used to be a king alone

by brynnmclean (ilfirin_estel)



Series: I used to be a king alone [1]
Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016)
Genre: A Date-Shaped Mission Or A Mission-Shaped Date, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, F/M, First Kiss, First Time, Fluff, Implied Sexual Content, Jyn is a cat person, Kissing, Mild Angst, Mutual Pining, Omze's Incredible Traveling Starport, RebelCaptain May the Fourth Exchange, Some EU Easter Eggs, Team as Family, The Lucky Ship Cat of Rogue One, Tooka Cats, Undercover as Married, Unresolved Romantic Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-04
Updated: 2018-05-04
Packaged: 2019-05-01 05:42:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,408
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14513769
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ilfirin_estel/pseuds/brynnmclean
Summary: “Six hours gives us plenty of time to go sight-seeing,” Jyn threw out into the quiet space between her and Cassian, keeping her voice light.Cassian snorted.  “I wonder what odds Kay would give for us getting into trouble.”Jyn grinned.  “Probably high.  Very high.”But he’s not always right,she wanted to say,it could go well for once.Or, the one where they're sent on a mission that isnota holiday or a date. Really.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [imsfire](https://archiveofourown.org/users/imsfire/gifts).



> This was written for the [Rebelcaptain Network](https://therebelcaptainnetwork.tumblr.com/tagged/admin%3A-may-4-exchange)'s May the Fourth fic exchange! I've had a blast participating this year. I hope you like this fic, **imsfire**!!!!
> 
> The prompt was _a moment of joy; sudden realisation of shared feelings, or shared lightness in the heart, or maybe a first kiss... In-universe or AU are both fine; any and all fluffy/happy tropes such as bed-sharing and hurt/comfort are welcomed; and also yes please, something happy!_
> 
> It's a little less trope-y than planned, but I hope the fluff in this piece pleases you!
> 
> Many thanks as always to my wonderful beta, [eisoj5](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eisoj5/pseuds/Eisoj5), for looking this over so many times and holding my hand throughout. You're the best, friend! <3
> 
> Title is from Dry the River's [No Rest](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=BONyS0AvVFw).
> 
>  **ETA** : the talented and lovely [leaiorganas](https://leaiorganas.tumblr.com) created a [moodboard](https://leaiorganas.tumblr.com/post/174677940695) for the fic!!!! AHHHHH THANK YOU <3

General Draven’s expression was his usual mask of indifference as he handed the datacard over, but there was a strange glint in his eyes that had Cassian straightening his back a shade more than usual. 

“You are authorized to bring a partner on this mission, Captain. _Organic_ ,” Draven said, with what some would call a hint of impatience, but Cassian had known the man long enough to catch an undercurrent of amusement. “The Starport prides itself on zero Imperial presence, so your droid will have to stay behind.”

“Understood,” Cassian said, his mind ringing with _Jyn, Jyn, Jyn_ before he snatched that refrain and tucked it into a mental file labeled _Not Now._

Draven’s left eyebrow twitched. “You and your partner will leave tomorrow morning at 0800.”

That gave Cassian... a relatively short window of time to—be very calm and cool and collected when he asked Jyn if she wanted to come with him on this mission. He could do that. Not a problem.

He casually folded his hands behind his back and ignored the fact that his palms were suddenly sweaty.

“Dismissed,” Draven said, already glancing down at another file on his desk. 

With an unnecessary nod, Cassian headed out of the office—and if he hadn’t known any better, he could have sworn he’d heard the general mutter, “Enjoy your holiday, Andor,” as the door slid shut.

-

It was 1600 by the time Cassian managed to track Jyn down on the bulk cruiser. She was in the hangar bay, laughing at something Bodhi called down to her as they fixed the faulty wiring in an A-wing. Bodhi was working on something inside the cockpit of the ship, while Jyn balanced on a ladder and untangled wires buried in a panel beneath the right wing. Jyn’s hair fell into her eyes when she looked up and spotted Cassian approaching them; she brushed the unruly strand away with a careless, grease-stained hand, and her eyes lit up when she smiled—Cassian checked his steps so he didn’t stumble in the face of that brightness.

“Captain,” Jyn said in greeting, no solemnity to the rank, only a warm amusement that always pulled Cassian up short. Before her—before her and Bodhi and Baze and Chirrut—he couldn’t remember the last time someone had gently ribbed him. It was… nice. He hoped he never did something to freeze any of them out.

“Sergeant,” Cassian replied, trying to echo that comfortable affection, studying Jyn’s face to see if he hit the mark. She didn’t wear all of her feelings on her sleeve, but most of the time, he could read the shifting light in her gaze on him—nothing dimmed now, and the tension he was carrying in his spine loosened a fraction.

Jyn glanced back at the underbelly of the A-wing and closed up the panel before she climbed down. She plucked a rag from the pocket of the mechanic’s jumpsuit she was wearing—it was ill-fitted, too broad in the shoulders for her slight frame, and Cassian had the absurd desire to smooth the bulky fabric out—and she wiped away most of the oil from her hands. 

Cassian meant to say something about the upcoming mission, but when he opened his mouth, different words tumbled out, “You have engine oil on your forehead.”

“Oh.” Jyn swiped at the mark, successful only in smearing it. “I’ll have to shower before dinner. Is that why you’re here? Come to collect us for the meal?”

“No,” Cassian admitted, though dinner did sound like a good idea for all of them—Jyn and Bodhi frequently forgot to eat, Jyn because she still wasn’t used to a regular meal supply or schedule and Bodhi because he got caught up in work. Cassian did the same, if he was honest. “But we can do that.”

Bodhi popped his head out from the cockpit and peered down at them. “Did I hear something about food?”

“Yeah,” Jyn said, waving him down. “Let’s go. We can find Baze and Chirrut and—” She glanced back at Cassian, and Cassian couldn’t help but rock forward, pulled in by the grin she flashed him. “Kay, also. Let’s grab food from the mess and pile into your fancy officer’s quarters.”

“Family dinner, huh,” Bodhi said, and Cassian wasn’t sure if he would ever get used to the sound of that, let alone how the phrase curled inside his chest and bedded down in a soft place he had thought long hardened and cold. It had been nearly a year since Scarif and he still was shocked to find that he’d stumbled into acquiring a family.

“Sounds good to me,” he told Jyn as Bodhi disappeared to finish up his work. “I have news for you all anyway.”

Jyn crinkled her nose at him, wiping at her forehead again. “A mission?”

Cassian carefully curled his hands into fists to stop himself from reaching out and touching Jyn—the rumpled shoulder, the grease smear, the strand of hair that fell again in front of her eye. “A short one. Information pick-up. I leave tomorrow, and I’m—” He thought he’d trained himself out of nervous ticks, but he folded his fingers tighter and bit the inside of his cheek as apprehension fluttered in his stomach and his palms itched. The pause between his words lasted only a second, but Jyn cocked her head, a sure sign she noticed. “—authorized a partner. Can’t be Kay, he’d be too conspicuous at the port.”

Jyn looked torn between a grimace and a laugh. “Oh, he won’t be happy about that at all.”

-

He wasn’t.

Kay’s optics flared a bright, burning white before he turned away from Cassian and focused on Jyn, who had just shoveled a forkful of protein into her mouth. “If I am not allowed to go with Cassian, you must go with him in my stead.”

“ _Kay_ ,” Cassian groaned because that wasn’t—he hadn’t _asked_ yet, damn it—

Jyn swallowed her bite of food and stared levelly at Kay for a second before she nodded. “Of course I am.”

Cassian felt heat creep up the back of his neck when Jyn shot him a glance that was measuring, but had a hint of a challenge in it. He keenly felt everyone else looking at him too, waiting for his response. Bodhi’s eyes kept darting from Jyn to Cassian and back again like he was waiting for an argument. Baze rumbled something Cassian didn’t catch, but sounded fondly exasperated. Chirrut had his sightless gaze pinned to a point over Cassian’s shoulder, but he radiated knowing amusement, and that, as usual, got under Cassian’s skin in a terrifyingly disarming way.

Cassian took a bite of his dinner, buying time while he gathered up his composure. He could at least try to trick himself into believing he wasn’t being seen.

“I was going to ask,” he finally said, ignoring the flush creeping across his face and the way the words sounded defensive in the air. He glanced up at Jyn in time to see her expression soften.

She kicked her leg out so that her boot tapped against his. “Good. It’s settled.” She turned her attention back to her dinner.

Chirrut was definitely laughing at them. So was Baze, judging by the shade of a smirk Cassian caught out of the corner of his eyes. But Cassian couldn’t bring himself to care, because Jyn added, “You’re not going alone.”


	2. Chapter 2

Jyn had heard about Omze’s Incredible Traveling Starport once or twice. It was hard not to, with a name like that. She’d bounced from spaceport to spaceport during her years alone, and she remembered the first time she’d heard the rumors about alien gladiators retrofitting a _Neutron Star_ -class cruiser into a completely mobile trading and entertainment outpost.

“I still can’t believe this damn thing is real,” she told Cassian as the alert sounded for them to start coming out of hyperspace.

Cassian gave her a wry smile and shrugged one shoulder. “I’ve been here once. It’ll be interesting to see it again.”

The spaceport was currently floating around the Atrivis sector in the Outer Rim, orbiting the planet Generis—which was lucky because if they needed to bug out, they could probably find shelter in the orbital base for the Atrivis Resistance Group. 

“Senator Mon Mothma is negotiating a treaty with the leadership of the Resistance Group to bring them into the Alliance,” Cassian said, tapping at the diagram of Generis on the ship’s computer so that the image of the planet spun on its axis. The Resistance Group’s base was a small dot in space on the other side of the planet from Omze’s Starport. “The Alliance sent ambassadors out a month ago.”

Jyn exchanged a glance with Cassian that confirmed his opinion on senatorial negotiations—slow, but apparently necessary. It had been awhile since Scarif, but Jyn’s mouth still twisted with bitterness when she thought of the scared, squabbling senators on Yavin IV. 

Cassian carefully eased the lever to take them back to normal space, the starlines shrinking down to points in the black. Then he reached over to press his fingertips briefly against the back of her hand.

_They were never going to believe you_ , Jyn heard, echoes in her head and her heart. _But I do._

Jyn wanted to catch his hand and hold it for a second, but he’d already pulled away.

“The negotiators are different personnel on a different mission than ours,” Cassian muttered, gaze flicking to the controls in front of him and then the green and blue planet looming in their viewport. “Here we are.”

Jyn scanned the sightlines until she saw—yes, there it was ahead, the huge cruiser with two of three docking bay forcefields glowing blue. The third was red, which Jyn assumed meant it was at full capacity.

The briefing had said each docking bay was big enough to hold four small freighters. As Cassian steered the ship the Alliance had loaned them toward the port, hailed the cruiser, and requested landing coordinates, Jyn flipped back through the scandocs she’d forged for them.

They were in a _Tempest_ -class gunship freighter, currently identified as _Ariel’s Pride_. It had been banged around a good deal before it had come into the Rebellion’s hands and, thus, wasn’t much to look at, but Bodhi had checked it over before their departure and said it at least looked a step above the junker that was Han Solo’s ship.

It wasn’t really the ship that mattered, though, as long as they had good IDs and good credits. And Thrace and Lika Matare were a married pair of smugglers, just off a decent haul with money to burn on entertainments in the Starport.

“We’ve made good time,” Cassian murmured as he landed their freighter. “We’re meeting with our contact at the Starboard Broadside Club in six hours.”

“And they’ll have the shipping schedules we want,” Jyn said, fingering her mother’s kyber crystal and sending a quick prayer to the Force—to Lyra—that all would go smoothly. She glanced over at Cassian and saw anew the weariness in the line of his shoulders, the dark shadows under his eyes. _Has he been sleeping at all,_ she wondered, and then thought, _I haven’t either_. She probably looked similarly worn, but she hadn’t seriously studied her own reflection in the mirror in… awhile. 

In the hangar, Cassian had called this mission short. A meeting in a cantina, a datachip slid across a table, hopefully a list of planets the Empire was stripping for metals. Jyn carefully did not let herself consider what the Imperials could be building with dolovite and doonium again.

In and out in a week, most of the time eaten up by hyperspace travel. Easy, comparatively. They could use easy. They could use rest, but neither of them were suited for idleness.

“Six hours gives us plenty of time to go sight-seeing,” Jyn threw out into the quiet space between her and Cassian, keeping her voice light.

Cassian snorted. “I wonder what odds Kay would give for us getting into trouble.”

Jyn grinned. “Probably high. Very high.” _But he’s not always right,_ she wanted to say, _it could go well for once._ Saying that out loud felt too much like tempting fate, so she swallowed it down and climbed to her feet. Cassian didn’t stir, squinting out the viewport at the security checkpoint, a pensive cast to his face.

Jyn’s mouth dried up, her heart thumping against her ribcage. She flexed her right hand, the one closest to him, and imagined touching the scruff at his jawline. If she rubbed her thumb over that smudge of exhaustion beneath his eye, would it disappear? What would it feel like to sift her fingers through his dark hair? Would his face soften, his eyes flutter closed? Would he relax for a moment at her touch?

She could feel herself leaning closer to him, but the thought of reaching out sent a thrill of fear through her. What if he jerked away?

It didn’t bear thinking about. She cleared her throat and kicked her inconvenient desires into a corner. Cassian shook his head and seemed to shake whatever his thoughts were away. His expression changed, closing off into what Jyn thought of as his spymaster mask.

Except for his eyes. There was always a warm light in his eyes when he looked at her. She didn’t know what to call it, but the tight knot of anxiety in her gut eased at the sight.

“You good?” she asked him as they gathered up the belongings they were going to take out into the crowds, calmed by the act of counting all the knives she carried on her person.

Cassian checked the charge on his blaster and nodded at her. “Yeah. You?”

“Yeah,” she said. “All right, _husband_ , let’s go have some fun.” To her delight, his mask cracked—he was _blushing_.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is exponentially longer than the rest. Sorry! XD

The Merchant’s Deck was a crush of beings, as vendors and customers chattered and argued and negotiated in a thousand different tongues over weapons and food and clothing and other wares. Cassian wanted to go into the crowd with an objective in mind, but Jyn took his hand in hers and said, “Come on, we’re going _sight-seeing_ ,” before she pulled him along.

Cassian had been a younger man when he’d been here last—some would say a boy at sixteen standard, but he hadn’t been a boy since he was six—and he’d used his youth and smaller stature to his advantage, slipping in between stalls and groups of people, catching bits and pieces of information and putting it together to form a picture he could report back to—well, he’d thought of the other Intelligence operative he’d been traveling with as a _partner_ , but even back then, he’d known Kysa was more of a handler.

Being here with Jyn was markedly different. They kept pace with each other, moving in sync and staying close—they’d done this even as strangers on Jedha, instinctively mirroring as a unit, a team. Cassian looked at Jyn sometimes and felt a solid knowing, a grounded certainty in the word _partner_ that he’d never really experienced with someone else before.

Most of the time, though, when he looked at Jyn, his whole body rang with his awareness of her— _Jyn_ , he’d think, and her name in his head would be the jolting rush of punching into hyperspace, the sharp relief of finding safety after a firefight, the unfamiliar softness and warmth of being next to someone who offered genuine kindness. Her name would be on his tongue, but he knew every time he said it, his feelings spilled out into the sound, his heart laid bare at her feet.

He couldn’t say her name here any more than she could his—but this mission felt different to him, less intensive than a deep cover where he had to completely immerse himself in the skin of another man. Thrace was a smuggler traveling with his wife. There was almost a selfishness to letting truth bleed into the cover name that fell from his lips. “Lika,” he said, though _Jyn, Jyn, Jyn_ was beating all through his pulse. “Do you see anything you like?”

Jyn grinned at him, not answering in words right away, but in a head tilt toward a surveillance camera above them. Cassian had marked several at various points along the deck, and the pacing Rodian security guards that kept the peace. 

There was mirth dancing in the light of Jyn’s eyes. “There’s so much to see.”

Cassian bit back a smile, tugging her in close so his voice didn’t carry. His hands naturally found the curve of her waist. “We can’t hack into the security feed.” Not with Omze’kehr Kahr watching the feeds.

Jyn pressed her hands against his chest and Cassian tried not to think about her noticing the sudden skip of his heart. “Or the information network? Could be fun.”

“That’s a different deck,” Cassian reminded her, thinking back on the notes in the briefing. 

She meant Futor’s Network, named after the Sullustan infochant who ran the databank. It was rumored that the network tapped into all the news services across the galaxy, guaranteeing the most current information for the highest amount of credits. Having Jyn slice into that network was incredibly tempting. But they were working on a deadline, and Cassian didn’t want to risk blowing their cover before they picked up the information from their contact.

“Aren’t we trying to prove Kay wrong by _not_ getting into trouble?” Cassian asked.

Jyn laughed like she knew that was a soft ‘no’. “We’ll go next time. If we don’t burn bridges here, I’ll bully Draven into letting us come back.”

“I’d like to see that,” Cassian said seriously, stepping back, unable to stop himself from skimming his fingers down her arm to the back of her hand. _Stay close_ , he thought; she didn’t need him to say it as they walked onward.

“I want to see if we can find clothes,” Jyn said conversationally as they sidestepped a pair of crimson haired Zeltron buskers, their high soprano voices jarring with the deafening roar of a Wookiee upset over the quality of a blaster and the hiss of a squat Noghri bargaining with a Zabrak jeweler. “I could use new boots.”

“So could I,” Cassian replied. So could the whole Rebellion. Still, he was grateful for the goal in mind as they wandered.

Before they found a clothing shop they liked, however, they found a weapons trader with a wide, flashy array of knives that Jyn was interested in looking over. She hesitated at one blade, ghosting her fingers over the hilt, but not touching it. Cassian took a step forward to see what had caught her eye.

“Ahh yes, that one is a pretty one, isn’t it?” the Duros vendor said as Jyn let herself pick it up to study it.

She flicked the blade out and gave it a cursory glance, testing its sharpness with a nearly distracted air. Cassian watched her focus zero in on the design on the hilt—long purple leaves wrapped around it, the dark color subtle in the black, but still present as she turned it over in her hands and ran her fingertips along it.

“Kings’ crown,” Jyn murmured, a wistful note in her voice. She swallowed something back and set the knife back into the display, lingering over it for the same amount of time she’d taken to pick it up in the first place.

The vendor mentioned a reasonable price, but what mattered more was the confirmation that the design was based on a plant native to Onderon. Jyn smiled, but it was a crooked thing, and a shadow of grief passed across her face.

Cassian watched Jyn turn her attention to other weapons, but her gaze kept darting back to the knife he knew reminded her of her second father. Even with Jedha’s catacombs of Cadera crumbling around them, Cassian had heard Saw Gerrera call Jyn _his daughter_.

It was an easy decision to buy it. He tried to signal the Duros while Jyn looked over something else, but she caught his nod and widened her eyes at him. He shrugged a shoulder and offered her a smile, trying to summon up an attitude that would match their cover.

“What she wants, she gets,” he told the vendor as he handed over the credit chip. 

Jyn didn’t say anything as she tucked the blade into a pocket of her jacket, her expression a little bemused. Cassian kept his attention on the vendor and made sure to thank them courteously, trying to ease up on any inadvertent pressure he might have put on Jyn for a response.

“You can never have too many knives,” he told her when they stepped back onto the path, shooting for a quiet joke to break tension. “And that one suited you. Beautiful and razor sharp.”

Jyn stopped so abruptly that Cassian stumbled when he turned back to face her. She was smiling, but there was still something in her gaze when she studied him, searching. Cassian stilled, waiting for her to find what she was looking for, unsure if he should double-down on the cover or do something to convey what was beneath it— _it’s true, it suits you, you’re beautiful and you can cut me like no one else can, and I know you wanted it though you’d never say so_ —but Jyn spoke before he found anything that felt right. 

“Flatterer,” Jyn said, reaching up and curving her palm around the nape of his neck. She pulled him down as she pushed up onto her tiptoes and brushed her lips against his cheekbone, soft but searing.

 _The cover or the truth,_ was a distant thought in Cassian’s short-circuiting brain, _or a cover for the truth_. He wanted to turn his head and catch her mouth against his, but she rocked back on her heels and slipped out of his grasp.

“Thank you.”

Cassian took a moment to steady his breathing and order his heart to beat in a normal rhythm. He was a professional spy, they were in the middle of a crowd, and they were not themselves here. If he ever got to kiss her, he didn’t want it to be because she was pretending to be his wife or his lover or anything but herself. He wanted it to be real.

Still, a part of him filed away the memory of her mouth against his skin, her breath on his cheek. The quiet gratitude in her voice.

They took a turn toward the smell of food cooking over little stovetops, drink stands pouring out—

“Oh _stars_ ,” Jyn groaned, sniffing the air. “Is that caf that hasn’t burned to the bottom of the pot?”

Cassian couldn’t help laughing. “Would good caf make you feel better or worse about what we usually drink?”

Jyn looked at him sidelong, arching a brow. “I don’t know about you, but I refuse to pass it up.”

Cassian had to take a step back before he did something ill-advised like tip his head down and kiss her forehead. There wasn’t a reason for the impulse beyond the bright star of his affection blazing to life in his chest—and he couldn’t pass that off under the cover. “I’ll leave you to that,” he said instead, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jacket to stop himself from grasping her shoulders, pulling her in. “Do you want anything more substantial? I’ll see about food.”

Jyn waved a hand at him, already lengthening her strides toward her intended target. “Get whatever, I’ll get you a cup of this, too.”

Cassian took longer to get food, as most of the cooks sold dishes geared more toward alien palates and stomachs. By the time he returned to Jyn’s side with two medium sized bowls in hand, she was tipping the last dregs of her caf into her mouth and had a new bag under her arm.

She hummed, giving him a heavy-lidded look of pleasure that he could not meet for long. “You were gone so long, I found kitchen spices for Baze. I saw a tea shop, too. We should see about that tea Bodhi and Chirrut like.” She tossed her empty cup into a nearby trash bin and then wiggled her fingers at him. “I’ll trade you caf for food. What did you get?”

He handed her the bowl full of roasted chunks of meat and vegetables first. “Save some of that for me. This,” he said, keeping the other dish raised just high enough to make it clear she shouldn’t peer over the lip of the bowl to see the contents, “is for afterward.”

Jyn narrowed her eyes at him, but speared a green vegetable into her mouth and let him drink his caf in peace as they found a clear place to sit down. She was right, it was good caf. Certainly beat the instant powder they’d been brewing on their ship during the travel days.

Good caf was just as hard to come by as dessert in the Rebellion. Cassian was happy he’d been able to find the latter for Jyn.

Jyn polished off half of the plate in her hands and then traded him for the dessert he’d bought—beignets covered in powdered sugar. “Ooh,” she said appreciatively, taking one of the puff pastries out of the little pile. “These look amazing.”

Cassian quickly swallowed his bite of food, which was good foresight on his part because he would have choked at the sound Jyn made when she bit into the fried dough and found chocolate filling. “There’s, ah, two different kinds,” he told her, watching her finish the pastry and lick sugar off her fingers. “Jam and then chocolate.”

“You have to try one,” Jyn said, picking up another one and holding it out to him. He demurred, gesturing with the plate in his hands, but she insisted. “Just one bite. Come on, I know you have a sweet tooth.”

Cassian tried to hide all signs that he was startled by that comment. 

Somehow, though, Jyn saw through him and rolled her eyes. “You dump sugar in your caf when we’re not rationing it.”

Cassian took a sip of the caf she’d bought him and recognized anew that she’d sweetened it for him. “How do you know I don’t do that just to make it palatable?”

The smirk on her face—he felt caught, but pleased to be so. “You put it in the tea our friends make, too. Just take a bite of the damn pastry, Captain.”

 _Captain_ —the teasing affection in that brought him back home. She should have said _Thrace_ or some pet name that wasn’t his, didn’t belong to him. But _Captain_ said like that, like a dare, like loving recognition…

He leaned forward and took a careful bite into the dessert, a small surprised noise escaping him when he found a red, tart filling.

Jyn’s smirk softened into something that was better than perfectly made caf and the warmth of a full belly. “Good?”

Cassian put down his food and took the rest of the pastry from her, trying not to mark how their fingers brushed. “Yes, it is.”

-

The next place they stopped at was not one that Cassian expected Jyn to gravitate toward—but as soon as Jyn heard the mewl of an animal, she sped up and headed directly to a shop run by a Devaronian male and female. 

The place was large in comparison to others, as there were clear sections for each kind of animal on sale—canines in one area, small reptiles in another, rodents, birds… and then cats. While Cassian was distracted by the oddly familiar appearance of a human man with grey-streaked black hair crouching down in front of two vornskr pups, Jyn went over to the cages that held tooka-cats.

“Would you like to hold any of them?” the Devaronian woman asked Jyn, brushing her dark green hair behind her pointed ears and already reaching for a lock to one of the cages. Jyn murmured something Cassian lost in the rumbling growls of the vornskrs beginning to play-fight. When he approached Jyn, she had a purple striped kitten in her hands.

The kitten flicked its large ears and then squirmed in Jyn’s hands to butt the top of its head against her chin. Jyn carefully maneuvered the little animal to rest against her forearm so she could scritch the back of its neck and stroke along its spine.

“She likes you,” the seller said, rubbing at one of the large spots on her forehead. “However, I’ll warn you, she’s sweet, but gets into mischief.”

“Sounds like my kind of girl,” Jyn replied, glancing up at Cassian as he came up to them.

“Do you want to hold any of the cats, sir?”

Cassian shook his head and held his palms up. “Oh no, no, thank you. I’m fine here.”

The kitten stretched her little paws out, flashing tiny claws before she tried to climb up Jyn’s arm to her shoulder. Jyn laughed and helped her along, carefully pushing her rump and letting her fluffy tail slide through her fingers. Once the kitten got up to Jyn’s shoulder, she mewed and slowly blinked her large eyes at Cassian twice.

Cassian took that for an invitation and brushed his knuckles against the cat’s cheek.

“I always wanted a pet growing up,” Jyn said in that quiet, yet matter-of-fact tone she always had when she spoke of her childhood. “My father used to let me feed strays on Coruscant and my mother would get so mad when they followed us home. I think she didn’t want either them or me to get attached. It was hard when we—moved.” She nudged her cheek against the kitten’s ear and the kitten turned her head to lick Jyn’s face. Jyn startled at the touch with a giggle. “I had to make do with two tooka dolls when we lived on Lah’mu.” Jyn shrugged her shoulder and the kitten dug little holes into her jacket. “You sure you don’t want to hold her?”

“I’m not sure I could get her off your shoulder,” Cassian said, though he reached out to pet the animal again. “She looks like she’s claimed you.”

“You are sweet, aren’t you, little one,” Jyn murmured, scratching behind the kitten’s ear. Then she sighed and pulled the kitten off, ignoring the plaintive protests as she handed the cat back to the seller to put back in the cage with her littermates. “One day.”

Cassian briefly touched her shoulder as they left, rubbing his thumb along the tiny claw marks in the fabric of her jacket. “Some planets consider tooka-cats lucky on ships,” he found himself saying, thinking back on a mission from another Alliance member. “I knew someone who had to take a holo of their ship cat to get landing coordinates.”

The story served its purpose by making Jyn smile again. She bumped the back of her hand against his as they walked, often enough that he wondered if the touch might not be accidental. “Really?”

“Really. The higher ups had to send someone to acquire a cat first…”

Jyn barked an incredulous laugh and grabbed Cassian’s arm. “I can’t imagine—our _boss_ was too pleased by all this…”

“Thrace!”

The smile on Cassian’s face fell away and he went rigid with surprise as an unfamiliar voice called out his cover. Jyn’s hand jerked back from his arm and in the blink of an eye, Cassian saw the gleam of a knife, though she kept it held low. There were sparks in her eyes, a determination he knew would grow into an inferno if it came down to a fight.

 _Danger_ , her eyes said to him, but he shook his head slightly, trying to convey, _wait, we’re not blown yet._

He turned to see a tall, blue figure waving him over from a booth covered in droid parts and coding screens. The Twi’lek lifted a pair of goggles from his eyes and rested them carefully atop his head, his lekku swinging behind his back as he adjusted the vest he was wearing. Cassian took in the man’s face, his mechanic’s clothes, the droid parts littered haphazardly around him—some of them on display for sale, but most scattered about like a windstorm had come through—and it hit him.

“Wilam,” he called back in recognition, brushing his hand carefully down Jyn’s arm in a gesture he hoped registered as an all-clear before he made his way across the path to the rogue droid tech’s booth. “I didn’t know you were here.”

Wilam Olgreen’s face crinkled up when he laughed. He had more wrinkles than Cassian remembered. “Oh, you know. This is always a good place to avoid Imperial warrants and to make some good money. I did not know you were here either, Thrace!” There was a note to the name that sounded a shade teasing. He held out his hand for Cassian to take in greeting. “I haven’t seen you in… has it been ten years now?”

Cassian took the offered hand and shook it, sifting through the memories he had from their last meeting. “That is true, ten years. A great deal has changed since then.”

Wilam nodded, hazel eyes glinting. “Indeed. You were a beardless boy then, wandering in and telling me how to do my job.”

Jyn’s body pressed warm against Cassian’s side as she shifted forward. “He did what now?”

She looped her arm around Cassian’s— _the cover,_ Cassian reminded himself, trying to hide the jolt of pleasure he got at her touch, _she’s your_ wife, _so this is supposed to be normal_. His face grew hot all the same and his tongue felt thick in his mouth.

Wilam brightened, his gaze darting from Cassian to Jyn and back. “I’m a droid specialist. This one came in while I was reviving an MSE-6 droid that had been kicked around a few times too many…”

Cassian looked down at Jyn, trying to play off the strange burn of embarrassment inside him and regain his footing. “I offered advice. You know how I am about programming.”

Jyn met his gaze, her expression full of wry amusement. Cassian had to look away, glancing at the parts scattered across Wilam’s table. “That I do,” Jyn said, and then out of the corner of his eyes, Cassian saw her offer the other man a smile and a handshake. “I’m Lika, Thrace’s partner.”

“Wife, thank you,” Cassian said before he could stop himself, and he was aflame and off-kilter, but Jyn played it off beautifully, zero hesitation as she laced her fingers with his and pulled his hand up so she could kiss his knuckles affectionately. 

Wilam laughed. “Newlyweds? Congratulations. I suppose I should offer you a discount for that—and for the joy of seeing Thrace’s ears turn that shade of red. What can I do for you, beautiful Lika, wife of my old friend?”

Jyn squeezed Cassian’s hand, humming in thought. “Do you have anything for a KX-model Imperial droid?”

Wilam’s eyes went wide, a sharp grin showing all his filed teeth. “Oh,” he breathed, setting his tools down on his workbench. He reached across the table to clap Cassian on the shoulder, shaking him with rough affection. “You beautiful bastard, did you really do it? You reprogrammed one of them?”

Jyn laughed, a quiet sound that seemed to burst out of her mouth like an involuntary breath. Cassian marked the reaction before he nodded at the droid tech, brushing the man’s words aside with a modest shrug.

“Kay is a friend,” Cassian said, dropping his voice to a slight undertone. “And he would never forgive me if I didn’t ask an activist such as yourself for _something_.”

“An activist?” Jyn prompted with genuine interest. Cassian pressed closer to her as—something soft curled around his heart. Gratitude, maybe.

Wilam swept his arm out to both encompass his makeshift workshop and also to sketch a short, theatrical bow. “I prefer to think of myself as an ally doing my part to—sometimes quite literally—amplify the voices of those deemed by most to be servants rather than autonomous beings. I make enhancements and modifications that help our metal friends shake off their bonds of servitude and improve their lives. Just because a heart of circuitry beats inside a chassis instead of an organic chest, doesn’t mean one should have to call anyone Master.” 

He flicked his wrist and Cassian caught the barest hint of a scar beneath the cuff of the Twi’lek’s sleeve. Jyn stiffened next to Cassian at the sight and then Cassian felt her exhale as she forced herself back into the relaxed guise of a pleasant customer, instead of someone who recognized the signs of Imperial shackles.

Cassian rubbed his thumb against the back of her hand, hoping to soothe her.

“All this to say, Thrace,” Wilam added, changing tack, “I am _very interested_ in learning how you reprogrammed a KX-series Imperial security droid and I am _very willing_ to bargain with you for that information. Take your pick of my wares and we can make a deal.”

Cassian’s hesitation was genuine as he thought it over. But maybe… “Do you have a reinforced chassis?” Cassian asked, trying not to let his mind rest too long on the memory of blaster fire over comms and the last desperate command: _climb_. “Any, ah, hardware updates I could gift him?”

“‘Gift him,’” Wilam echoed, pointing his index finger at Cassian. “This is why I like you, Thrace. If your employers,” he added with light emphasis on the word and a knowing look crossing his jovial face for a second, “were more like you, perhaps I could be convinced to join up with your team.”

Jyn’s grip on Cassian’s hand tightened again. Cassian felt the metal holdings in his spine freeze, but he kept any sign of discomfort hidden behind a calm smile.

“Perhaps you could meet Kay in person,” he said, carefully laying down the offer.

“Tempting,” Wilam said, looking Cassian in the eye and letting the truth of that stand between them before he broke the moment with another sharp-toothed smile. “But you know I value a steady flow of credits too much for your organization. Though if you ever have need of an independent contractor such as myself, you must ask for me personally, friend. But enough of that talk!” He clapped his hands and turned his back on them, lekku swinging as he ducked down to rummage through a few boxes beneath his tables. “Let me see what I have that could be useful to you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Omze's Incredible Traveling Starport](http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Omze%27s_Incredible_Traveling_Starport) is an Actual Thing, and [Wilam Olgreen](http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Wilam_Olgreen) is also borrowed from the EU. I couldn't pass up using a tech in favor of the Droid Revolution.


	4. Chapter 4

By the time they had found parts useful to Kay and Jyn had cheerfully haggled with Cassian’s friend, the evening hours were fast approaching.

It was practical to return to the _Ariel’s Pride_ to drop off their purchases. What was impractical after they did that, was the impulse to put her hand on Cassian’s arm and say, “wait, just a second. Just—a second.” But Jyn reached out before she thought better of it.

Cassian stilled at her touch, then he opened his body up to hers, turning and resting his other hand on her shoulder. She had plenty of room to tuck herself against his chest if she wanted.

“You all right?” he asked, low and concerned, and though she nodded automatically, he didn’t let it go. “What is it?”

_I want to be us for a second_ , she wanted to say. _I want to trust in something true_. She couldn’t say that outright, it felt too vulnerable. They’d spent all day orbiting each other, making little affectionate gestures here and there—she’d caught the shock on his face when she’d kissed him on the cheek in thanks, and she was sure some of that had mirrored in her when Cassian had insisted on calling her his wife even though she’d given him the out of partner.

This was the first moment they’d had today where they could talk openly and she couldn’t even figure out what to say besides _wait_. 

She opened her mouth and hoped something would come out. “I just—want to check in with you.” Well, at least that was true.

Cassian’s face did something strange, some mix of understanding and apprehension flashing before the mask smoothed everything out. “Did I make you uncomfortable earlier?”

Jyn shook her head. “What about you?”

Cassian blinked and then nearly imperceptible frown lines appeared between his eyebrows. “No. When would you have made me uncomfortable?”

Jyn’s hand trembled with nerves as she reached up and tapped her index finger against Cassian's cheekbone. The frown on his face cleared, but he pinned his gaze to a point away from her and she felt his jaw work as he decided on a response.

Shit, she _had_ made him uncomfortable. She tried to drop her hand away from him, but he caught it and the apology that had been crawling in her throat got stuck.

“You can kiss me,” Cassian said, the words very simple, but the softness in his voice struck her like a blow.

Her heart contracted in her chest, aching behind her ribs. “Oh,” she breathed, and then—“For the cover?”

Cassian inhaled sharply and went very still. When he spoke again, the words came out slow, “Not just for the cover.”

“Oh,” she said again, stupidly, but he looked her in the eye and the warmth in his expression swept over her, burning all her thoughts away. She swayed on her feet and veered in close, tilting her face up, rising up again to press her mouth against him—and this time he met her and captured her lips with his own.

At first, the kiss was tentative, a light touch. Then Cassian’s breath shivered out and Jyn grabbed at his jacket for balance. His hands cupped her hips, then slid to the small of her back as she fell into him and kissed him harder, all the banked heat of her desire flaring into flames. He groaned when she licked into his mouth, curled his fingers into a fist in the back of her shirt like he wanted to pull it off her—and she thought, _yes_ , because that sounded good, she wanted to be closer to him, as close as she could get. His teeth grazed her lower lip and she lost the air in her lungs to a moan. She had to break away to suck in a breath and his beard scraped against her mouth, her jaw, sparks of sensation that she felt in her core. He ducked down to kiss the hinge of her jaw and his thigh was suddenly nudging between her legs—she pushed forward into him, plunging her hands in his hair, and she wanted—

Something clattered on the floor when Cassian stumbled, shattering the moment. He cursed, eyes gone wide as he looked down to see what he’d kicked—Jyn laughed breathlessly as she saw the parts they’d bought for Kay now knocked over and scattered.

They both backed off to clean. Cassian carefully didn’t look at Jyn, but a tiny smile curved across his mouth. Jyn kept darting glances at him and saw where her fingers had mussed up his hair, saw his tongue run along his bottom lip, saw a blush spread up the back of his neck.

But when they straightened and she thought about pushing him up against the wall and getting back to where they’d been, he brushed a strand of her hair from her face and shook his head.

“We should go. I don’t want to be late.”

Right. The contact, the shipping information. The mission. But—“Afterwards?” she dared to ask, relieved at the speed with which he said, “ _Yes_ , I—yes. Afterwards.”


	5. Chapter 5

The handoff went as smoothly as Cassian could have dreamed. As soon as they got back to the ship, Jyn worked out the encryption to send the information to the Alliance, and he locked away the datachip in a secure place for good measure.

“Is that it?” Jyn asked, shutting down the comms channel and watching Cassian with a pensive stare. “Can it…” She trailed off, clearly afraid to say it out loud, but he heard the sentiment anyway in the silence: _can it really be that easy?_

“Some things work out,” he told her, tapping his knuckles against the bulkhead, weariness pressing against his shoulders but in spite of that, he felt strangely light, too. “Sometimes hope is true.”

“Hope,” Jyn echoed, and he was suddenly back at the beginning, Jedhan dust in his mouth as they paused in the middle of a crowd of pilgrims; Eadu mud still on his boots as he listened to Jyn argue futilely against frightened senators— _Rebellions are built on hope._

He took a careful breath and let the memories dissipate like smoke. “It carried us through before.”

“It did,” Jyn said, soft. Something in the way she smiled at him then made him suspect she knew where his mind had gone. “And here we are.”

She crossed the distance between them and reached up to slide her arms around his neck. Each move she made was slow enough that he had plenty of opportunity to pull away. He opened his arms up to her and kissed her forehead first, then the bridge of her nose, then her lips—just once, careful.

“Is it Afterwards now?” he asked her, and she nipped at him, smiling as she answered, “Yes. Yes.”

-

Jyn’s side of the bed was empty when he woke, but when he reached across the sheets, they still held the warmth of her body.

Through the cabin door, he heard her swearing in Huttese at the caf machine in the mess.

“Good morning. I went out and bought a little of the good stuff for the ride home,” she told him when he joined her for breakfast, grinning and shaking the contents of a small bag into the machine.

Cassian wanted—he wanted to walk over to her and pull her into his arms and breathe her in. He wanted to ask her if she’d come back to bed after she’d slipped away in the middle of the night, if he could have woken up holding her—because he wanted, didn’t she know he wanted—

He rolled his shoulders and ran his hands through his hair to redirect his energy into a physical gesture that _wasn’t_ approaching her when she might not want him close. “I’ll grab a cup of that after I get us into the air. We good to go?”

Jyn pressed a couple buttons on the machine, nodding. Then, as he headed to the cockpit, she said, “Wait. Cassian.”

He didn’t let himself face her completely, afraid of what he’d reveal if she studied him too closely. If she wanted last night to be a one-time thing they wouldn’t address again, he would be fine. Find a way to be fine.

So at the sound of her voice, he paused in the doorway and tilted his head in her direction to indicate he was listening. But she didn’t let him hide from her. She came up and pressed her palm against his back, stroking up his shoulder blade to cup the nape of his neck as she pushed her way in front of him and looked him in the eye. 

“Hey,” she said, voice soft, her grip on him gone gentle, almost tentative. Tension bled from his spine as if she’d cut through a knot—he was unraveling in her hands as she tugged him down to her level. “Can I kiss you?”

“Yes,” he said, just before her lips met his.

It was the kiss he’d hoped to have earlier, warm and perfect, with her body pressed up against his like she wanted to make a home in his arms.

“Good morning,” she sighed against him when they pulled away for air.

“Good morning.” His voice came out rough. He licked his lips and was gratified when he saw her follow the movement and shiver. “I thought,” he began, but she brushed her mouth against his again and stole the words. When she let him go, he caught his breath. “You left the bed. I thought you’d changed your mind.”

“Ahh.” Jyn brushed her fingertips along his brow, smoothing out the furrows. “I should have left a note. Next time.” She kissed him a third time, quick and sweet, before he could respond. “Come on, let’s get this ship moving.”

A few minutes later, the ship rumbled beneath them and then leveled out into the calm of hyperspace, starlines streaking across their viewport. Cassian let himself take a slow, calming breath, the relief of the mission being complete sinking into his bones.

Jyn reached across the space between their seats and entwined her fingers with his, and that—that was good, too. 

_Next time_ , she’d said, and he thrilled at the possibility of a future as partners, as _lovers_ , stretching out before them, as bright and beautiful as the starlight caught in Jyn’s eyes.

A crash from another part of the ship scattered Cassian’s thoughts. Cassian and Jyn both jumped up from their chairs and whirled around as little footsteps scampered into the cockpit and—a little purple ball of fluff darted at Jyn’s legs. 

The kitten from the Merchant’s Deck. It twined circles around Jyn’s ankles, meowing plaintively. Jyn shot Cassian a sheepish look before she scooped the kitten off the floor and coaxed it up to perch on her shoulder. The kitten mewled at Jyn again before blinking its large amber eyes at Cassian and purring incredibly loudly for such a small animal.

“I… may have gone to more than the caf shop this morning. I thought we could use a little luck at home,” Jyn said, scratching the kitten under its chin. “Though, what do you think… should we name her ‘Trouble’?”

Cassian watched Jyn smile as the kitten kneaded her shoulder and happily dug tiny little holes in her jacket again—and despite himself, he was hopelessly, helplessly charmed. “That sounds perfect.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am planning on writing a bonus related fic that features my usual Cassian Andor tag, so stay tuned for that hopefully in the near future!
> 
> <3


End file.
